Way behind, I'm trying to catch up watching previous seasons OnDemand, although, side note, I'm super irritated that OnDemand replaced Episode 9 (which looked like it was going to be juicy - the end of Episode 8 had someone pounding on Ashley's door amidst all the talk of racist comments posted on their wedding website) with some INSUFFERABLE bullshit with Molly & MesseJesse, which I refused to sit through. So I don't know who was at the door, or what happened with all of that.
That said, I have some thoughts on the couples from this season, although I'm not quite finished watching the whole thing.
Eric & Leida
Ermahgherd, what a selfish, self-involved, self-important, OCD-havin' COOZE Leida is! The fact that she was furious about Eric paying child support because it cut into her wedding budget was unreal and her treatment of Tasha was inexcusable, especially when Eric wasn't standing up for his own daughter. Leida sees Eric as a ticket to the US so she can further her career, not as a partner. I was GOBSMACKED that Allessandro was 5 years old - he behaved & looked like a 2 or 3 year old. Leida is probably stunting his physical and emotional growth with her ridiculous antics. Her OCD is clearly kowtowed to by her parents, but she needs to get it under control. Just shrieking, "NOT PROPER NOT PROPER!!" over and over is not the way to get people to want to comply with your unreasonable demands.
Prognosis: DOOMED
Colt & Larrissa
Where to even begin with these two weirdos? Colt has a seriously unhealthy relationship with his mother and his mother is even more of a codependent than he is. Something is just very broken there. I don't know where Larrissa even fits into life with Debbie and Colt. As much as I hate saying it, Larrissa is actually right about Colt needing to cut the umbilical. That's probably the ONLY thing I agreed with her on. What a nightmare she is. From her first moments, bitching about not getting flowers at the airport (and then just HARPING on it) to her screaming, "He who goes against the queen dies!" at Colt's cousin, Larrissa is the personification of red flags. Meanwhile, Colt is just clueless and having a completely different relationship than she's having. He knows she's afraid of heights, but takes her to the top of the Stratosphere to propose because that's where HE wanted to do it, without any regard to how uncomfortable his lack of consideration made her.
Prognosis: DOOMED. Colt is gonna end up back at his mom's.
KALANI & ASUELO
I think I really needed to see Asuelo in Samoa to know whether my impressions of him are accurate, but he seems genuinely... simple. He comes off as so childlike in his mannerisms and speech. That he has a voice like a little flute doesn't help. That's why I'd have to see what he's like when he's not overwhelmed by being in the US, the language barrier, meeting his son, meeting his girlfriend's freaking TERRIFYING dad, dealing with her sister, etc. Because from the perspective the show gives, Kalani is being mommy to her son and her husband - and was cookin' another bun in the oven, to boot. I worry that Kalani felt obligated to marry Asuelo because she lost her virginity to him & that might be more acceptable to the LDS Church. But I'm super curious if Kalani's dad made Asuelo convert! I'm cracking up thinking about Asuelo asking about planet Kolab.
ASHLEY & JAY
Poor dumb girl. NO 20 year old boy wants to get married. Especially not a player like Jay. I could tell he was too slick from the first episode. He never denied Natalie's accusations, he just said she had no proof. I've known my fair share of "Jays" and I saw this trainwreck coming from miles away. I was also SO ANNOYED that when they went to Vegas to elope, they chose to do it at a cheesy, bad-Elvis-impersonator's chapel, where he made the vows seem like they were meant to be taken as a joke. It's not all that hard to imagine Jay thinking he could take all of that lightly - again, 20 year old kids tend to lack appreciation for the gravity of some of their actions. Ashley set herself up for failure. She thinks her bad choices in men are "bad luck," rather than HER BAD DECISIONS. She was up Jay's butt from the moment he stepped foot in her apartment. (Incidentally, where were her kids? She made a big to-do about "being a working mom," but her kids don't meet her new husband or live with her? There's a story there - I'm sure you veterans already know it. LOL!) She's a self-fulfilling prophesy with the paranoia about being cheated on. The way to alleviate that is not demanding monogamy, but that's just me.
Prognosis: DOA
STEPHEN & OLGA
Ugh.. so young to be new parents. Both are still so immature themselves, but the baby is adorbs and against my better judgement, I'm rooting for these two. I think he's got some good building blocks for becoming a great dad and husband - when he grows up and stops making everything about him and his own needs. I think the new baby is giving him a baptism by fire in that arena. Olga seems sweet and genuine, although we saw more of her innards than I would've liked. YEEKS.
Prognosis: I have foolish hope. But I also haven't read the spoilers yet.
Who am I leaving out?
Oh yeah...
JONATHAN & FERNANDA
I forgot about these two in my original post. Mostly because they were so forgettable. Jonathan seems like a typical douchebro kind of dude and Fer just comes off as naive and enamored of this older American guy who was giving her all that attention. I was bothered by his stated reasons for falling in love with her because all he listed were her physical traits, not her heart or her mind. I was a little surprised to see Fer acting so immaturely at the Tell-All, but then I remembered that she's immature because she's still a kid. There was no reason to go after Larissa like she did, regardless of anything that happened on social media. It was petty and juvenile. It was also unwise, given the fact that Larissa clearly has anger issues and no control over her behavior when she perceives she's being attacked. I ultimately liked Jonathan because he did show some genuine heart eventually.
Prognosis: The age difference is going to be an issue. Age isn't just a number, it's also life experience and maturity. I predict there will be problems.
Edited November 26, 2019 by FrancescaFioreETA Jonathan & Fernanda
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